The Journey of Parenthood…

My “Spear Stories”

At the visitation on Saturday they had these little cards that said: “the family would love to hear your stories of Spear.” And included an email address. What a GREAT idea! Uncle Spear was one of those type of people that touched so many lives so I’m sure hundreds of people have stories they’d love to share about him! I thought I’d write some of my fond memories here and then also email this post to the family to share. I already posted all of the pictures I had on my computer of Uncle Spear in the post when he got diagnosed (which you can read here). So I took some time and found several old pictures that I thought I would share along with some of my memories with Uncle Spear. Enjoy!

It’s hard to begin to think of all of my great memories with Uncle Spear. We would spend a lot of time at my dad’s house on Lake Lanier and Uncle Spear and Aunt Cheryl would drive down often. We also drove up to visit them quite often as well and I will always remember the fun times we shared at Furman football games.

During those days at Dad’s house I remember how EARLY Uncle Spear would get up each morning. He was ALWAYS up and always so HAPPY. As a teenager, it was pretty obnoxious actually haha. I’d be half asleep and it’d be 9:00 and he’d joke that I missed the day as he got up at 5! He loved being outdoors and loved having a good time. Blade (his dog) would often come with him on his visits and it was so neat to see them interact. He’d tell Blade to “Go Southern” and Blade would promptly pee (we loved this so much that we taught our dog, Christy, to “Go Gator” haha). Blade was so well trained that he’d do anything Uncle Spear told him to do…even jump off the top of Dad’s double-decker dock!!! No joke! That dog loved his master for sure!

Uncle Spear, Aunt Cheryl, and Blade

Some of my fondest memories with Uncle Spear were our trips to Maine. I know at least one trip he drove up with us and you REALLY bond on that trip. It’s a 24 hour drive so we’d drive 12 hours one day and 12 the next…a little crazy huh?!? We’d joke around and he’d give me a hard time about stuff. He was always giving me a hard time! When we would stop to eat he’d always want to go to Cracker Barrel. It was his favorite restaurant and I loathed it. I also couldn’t stand Waffle House and he’d ask me why I didn’t like either of them and I said the yellow color made me want to puke (I can’t smell at all and can’t taste well so looks have a lot to do with my eating habits). That’s how the whole yellow-shirt thing started…he wore this super ugly yellow flannel shirt and I told him it reminded me of the Waffle House/ Cracker Barrel yellow so then he, of course, would wear it EVERY TIME he saw me!!!

being silly in the yellow shirt

Since his diagnoses with ALS this past year, anytime I’ve asked for prayers for him people always tell me they love the name Spear! I love it too! It’s so unique and masculine ya know? My Uncle Spear was actually named after his Uncle Spear! My Great Uncle Spear was so funny and truly a “Maine Man.” He was burly and manly and was a “dirty old man” no doubt! It was always fun to spend time with him and to see he and Uncle Spear together. He’d call Uncle Spear “Namesake” and since he didn’t have a son I know his relationship with both Uncle Spear and my dad meant a lot to him. I hope the Spear name gets carried on…if no one else plans on using it WE WILL! haha 🙂

the two Spear’s

my sister Kori, Great Uncle Spear, his wife Leigh, Me and Uncle Spear

For as long as I can remember Uncle Spear and my dad were always close. They are less than two years apart in age and they did a lot together. From hanging out at the house, to taking trips to Maine, to duck hunting and everything in-between they spent as much time together as they could. I know towards the end of his brother’s life, my dad got even closer with Uncle Spear. He stayed up in Greenville for many weeks to spend quality time at the hospice room with him. Those days were so special to Dad and I know it’s probably hard for him to accept that Uncle Spear is really gone. The two of them had SO many plans for the future together and I’m sure Dad can’t imagine retiring without Uncle Spear retiring along beside him!

Love this one! It’s from 1986

Grammie with all her children: Aunt Donna, Uncle Spear, Aunt Janice and my dad

A group shot:

Michele, Uncle Spear, Me, Grammie, Aunt Cheryl, Aunt Janice, Mellina, Mercina, Aunt Donna, Mom, Maria, Suzanne and Rebecca

Every New Years we had a fun Sedgley family tradition of going out to a fancy dinner at a restaurant in Gainesville (GA) called Rudolf’s. It was always such a great time and Uncle Spear and Aunt Cheryl came down almost every year for it. It’s a tradition I miss so much and no New Year’s will EVER be the same to me! I remember Uncle Spear would brush my hair for me while we waited for the ball to drop and it was so sweet. You could tell he had three daughters as he knew that balance of being silly but not too silly so he wouldn’t hurt your feelings (us girls are sensitive!) and he knew when to be loving too. 

We took a picture in front of the same tree every year

Aunt Cheryl, Uncle Spear, Suzanne, Todd, Brandon, Dad, Me and Mark

Of course Uncle Spear was always our free dinner entertainment…here he’s being silly making fun of Dad!

Some of my favorite times with Uncle Spear were just hanging around and being silly. I remember one time at his house he pushed me on the swing they had out front and spun me around and around and around. Omg I have never been so sick then I had to get in the car for our drive back home! I wanted to vomit!!! I also will never forget Uncle Spear and his duck calls. He was a MASTER at making all kinds of animal sounds. I’m sure he was a great hunter too as he knew how to talk to the animals. He had such a love of bird watching and I know Zach’s favorite memory of Uncle Spear is spending time at their house watching the birds in their yard with them. We’d go visit whenever we could and it was always so neat to see SO many birds on different feeders in their yard!

Last time we saw Uncle Spear we asked him for some tips as we have had a feeder with food hanging in our back yard forever but haven’t had a single bird come to it. The day Uncle Spear moved to the hospice room we had THREE brown thrashers feeding on it!!! It was exciting and immediately made us think of him! At that time he was able to text so I wrote him a text and told him about it. I didn’t know it’d be the last communication we shared. I told him how we saw three birds and how we thought of him and his response? “See, I passed it on.”

playing with a duck call

While I have so many great memories with Uncle Spear more than anything else I appreciate the potential he saw in me. During a time in my life where I needed guidance he was there to push me along in the right direction. I didn’t realize it at the time but all of his poking and teasing was all for a deeper purpose. He wanted me to choose to do right, to be the woman he knew I could be. I always loved when Zach and I would go to visit them as I feel that I did live up to his expectations that he had for me and I feel that I do, overall, do the right thing! On our last time visiting with him, Uncle Spear and I had a few moments alone and hearing him tell me that he’s proud of me made me so happy. I’m so thankful for all the special moments I had with such a great man and even more thankful that he helped shape me into the woman I am today!

Aunt Cheryl, Uncle Spear (LOVE the shirt haha), Suzanne and baby Emily (or Kye’s twin?!?)

Emily Parker
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